Mamma's Log, October 17, 2007 Update

In honor of DH who was a Star Trek geek, I labeled this post "Mamma's Log" (say it with the gusto of Captain Kirk when he was stil thin and sexy, as opposed to his funny sexy character on Boston Legal now). I forgot to mention my "baptism" yesterday from Leena. She passed all her medical exams with flying colors with the acception of having Giardia, an intestinal parasite (or worms as Daddy likes to say). So, she is on medicine that apparantly works by making her have frequent BM's, most often on my shift (AM I LUCKY OR WHAT???). Well, yesterday I hook my finger into the back of her diaper to check if it needs changed and into the caudrin of cuck was I! Then, I go into the torturous situation of having to use one hand to hold both legs up to keep her but off the changing pad, one hand to hold her hands from getting into the mess and another hand to try and remove one stinking wipe from a dispenser that was no doubt desinged by a demented man suffering from neglect! Sixteen wipes later, the situation was over with with no fatalities! I consider myself a professional now. BRING IT ON, BABY!



Motherhood presents all kinds of wonderous activities for the strong of stomach. Miss Leena's other favorite thing while letting my type this email or check other messages is to play with my pen/pencil drawer. Well, she discovered the pencils with eraser and chewed two off! So, again lucky Mommy, I taught her to stick out her tongue so I can then do a finger sweep in her mouth ro remove eraser bits, paper and whatever else the Chomping Chewer has put in there. (The way Leena chews paper I swear sometimes she is part Billy-Goat.) Then there is snot to wipe, slobbers that only accumulate when you have no tissues or access to one, so of course it gets wiped with your hand and then on your pants. Did I tell you my laundry had trippled in the past few weeks? Leena is just a slobbery, buggery, back-wash loaded bundle of joy, I tell you. Erma Bombeck would be so overjoyed!

Leena also discovered the copier machine yesterday and found great joy in the fact that she could reach the start button. The sound of paper running blank thorugh the machine was a regular laugh fest! Again, I need six arms for this kid. One to type with, two to keep her hands out of reach, two to keep her feet from getting into all the moving boxes and on and on.

Well, Little Miss Pumpkin is now stuck in a box of important papers that she attempted to use as leverage for standing at the window. I have to extract her ever growing J-Lo exterior and get back to move projects. I think I'll take on a marathon next.....this has to be training me for something!